Sunday, January 7, 2024

Getting Past the Past

 How many relationship advice books, talks, or articles have you read/heard that preach the importance of forgiveness?  Coming off a holiday in which Christians celebrate the supreme act of sacrifice and ultimately forgiveness, now is a most appropriate time to emphasize the healing power of forgiving others.

But are you forgiving yourself, too?  Only the most dysfunctional person doesn’t feel remorse over something he or she has done or neglected to do.  In January particularly, people wallow in regret over some social or familial misstep or are in despair and self-reproach over their extravagance during the holidays as they start to face their swollen credit card bills.  

When it comes to finances, I think I can safely say that almost no one can recall everything he has charged on his credit card over the last thirty days without consulting his card statement.  And hopefully he IS consulting it every month.  I have a friend that, despite being advised to do so, rarely if ever checked her credit card statements.   She got a shock last week when she discovered by reviewing her credit card bill that she was getting charged extra fees for the allegedly inexpensive items she was buying online and through TV shopping networks.  She swears she’s going to stop shopping like that.  A good New Year’s resolution, yes?

But resolving to do better with your finances is only half the battle, isn’t it?  The bills from December still must be paid, and trying to scrape together the money to pay them off might be a challenge.  You are reminded each month of your past financial sins.  But not moving past the guilt you might feel, not forgiving yourself, nor looking to the future, will inhibit you from implementing the change you desire.

I know.  This sounds very Pollyannish.  The power of positive thinking, self-forgiveness, and so on.  But remember the greatest event of all time that we just celebrated December 25.  It might have been buried in your spending spree, but it was still there and is still here as we begin a new year.  You are not defined by your mistakes or your worst moments.   

Set a couple of financial goals for 2024.  Share those resolutions with a friend who can help hold you accountable to them.  (And maybe your resolutions can also include fostering more of those types of friendships.)  And put the guilt behind you.

Until next time,

Roger

“I, even I, am He who blots out your transgressions, for my own sake, and remembers your sins no more.”  Isaiah 43:25 NIV*

*Scripture quotations taken from the Holy Bible, New International Version® NIV® Copyright © 1973, 1978, 1984, 2011 by Biblica, Inc.™ Used by permission.  All rights reserved worldwide.

 

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